LMFT, D. Min.

Meditation and the Reality Hammer of Life


We’ve all been there or will be in our lives. Illness or other life crisis strikes, it never comes at a good time. There’s always too much going on and too much that needs to be done. When crisis happens there is no choice but to take the time necessary for healing yourself or dealing with the crisis. It’s the reality hammer of life that says: “Slow down, girl, this is something important.” You must pay attention. Priorities, all of a sudden, are different. We know we can’t control the crisis whether it is illness, finances, or changes in relationship or employment. But we can learn something about our lives during and after the crisis.

By looking at our lives in crisis, we may be surprised to see so much over activity that prevented the rest we wanted to take, but was never taken, the attention to ourselves or someone we love that we never seemed to have time for. Perhaps we know meditation is a great way to de-stress but never seemed to have the time. Exploring the reasons for our over activity and why we have put off priorities is the first step to change: maybe we are working too hard, taking on too many projects, or maybe we are not able to say no. Why do we say yes and overextend ourselves? I have found there are a few common answers to these questions. Are any of these you?

Doing too much to bolster your own sense of self-esteem, to get the kudos and attention of those you care about or acknowledgement in your professional life, or from those you hold in high regard. Perhaps, you keep saying yes so as not to rock the boat with a “No” after so many yeses or you do what someone else wanted you to do rather than taking care of yourself. Any of these sound familiar?

After a life crisis many have feelings of “Thank God, I was able to get through this.” We feel empowered with the abilities of our bodies and minds that aided us in dealing with the crisis.

The lessons from all this? Three simple themes to explore:

1. It’s okay to have boundaries: explore yours: are you able to say no? Remember saying no to others’ requests is a strong “Yes” to yourself.

2. Give yourself credit for a job well done. When you wait for others to acknowledge you, you set yourself up for disappointment. Learn to pat yourself on the back.

3. Bring compassion for yourself into your life after the crisis: do the things that bring peace, well being and love into your life. The reality hammer of life can’t be stopped. What matters is how we pick up the pieces and move on, empowered, better and always learning. There’s no better time like the now.

Peace Within brings Peace to all,


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